The Season of the Snob

Ahhh, Autumn, my favorite time of the year! 'Tis the season of fall festivals, changing leaves, Halloween, and fall seasonal beer! Yes, it is indeed the season of the snob. Why, you ask. Well, let me just tell you.


It starts with beer. No, not any of those faux-beer products that end in -ite or -eiser. I am talking about REAL beer. Beer with substance, color, and flavor. I do enjoy tasting my way around the seasons, but I admit, I am always most eager to sample the darker colors and robust flavors that arrive with fall;

• Oktoberfest Marzen-style beers have been pleasing palettes for centuriess. Let's face it, the Germans know their way around beer, so in fall, let's drink like the Germans! Prost!

• Pumpkin Ale (or Punkin for some labels). Beware, not all Pumpkins are created equal. Some are subtle pumpkin flavor while other will whack you upside the head with their nutmeg. I recommend sampling to find what's right for you.



• Be on the lookout for seasonal specialties such as New Belgium's Hoptober (NOT an Oktoberfest beer).


• Just think in terms of fall colors; brown, ambers, porters (oh, I guess that's not a color...silly, me!)

Beyond beer, there are many other aspects of Autumn that bring out my inner snob ('cause I really need help bringing out my i.s.) . . .

Halloween

• Let's discuss costumes - when did my favorite holiday turn into a cute, glittery, display of half nakedness???? Seriously folks, it is a holiday that is all about the creepy. And not turning a classic horror character into some sexy madness (see image below). Bonus points for assembling your own costume!
  


• Decorations - there is no need to be the Griswalds of Halloween with your 50 blow ups in your front yard. Subtle is so much better, a graveyard, in the front yard, serious cobwebs, save some funky bottles for your own witches shelf . . . once again, it is all about the creepy.


• Treats - don't trick up the kiddies by giving them "healthy" crap. Pretzels??? Really??? Give 'em some REAL candy, and not the cheap stuff. I'm talking KitKats, Twizzlers, and Reeses Cups. Come one, it is once a year.

Football

• Three letters . . . NFL, home of the big boys, serious talent, a somewhat balanced league, and a real playoff system. (Football fans, you know what I mean).

Thanksgiving

• Stuffing belongs IN the bird for goodness sake! That is why they call if STUFFING. While you are at it, make sure you season it, please.


• If there is a potato dish, it should be mashed and made from real potato pieces, and not flakes.
  

Pass me the pumpkin pie, please.